Tuesday, May 6, 2008
I made the stunning realization yesterday that the reason I enjoy going for runs (especially on dirt trails, next to streams, and past blossoming trees) is because it makes me feel really alive. It reminds me (subconsciously) about what I really am and about what I'm here to do. My body gets to work hard, I get to be connected and in touch with the natural world and the rhythyms of the changing season. I made this realization yesterday after being at my desk all day. At 4, Mirelle woke up from her nap and we went outside. Aah! It was such a glorious afternoon. Glorious is the most fitting description. Little blossoms were emerging on a red-leaved bush, the delicate first shoots of growth on the tree in the front yard were starting to shift toward leaves, purple flowers had already appeared on a creeping vine. I plucked one, two, three, four and five ! purple flowers and placed one in each of Mirelle's button holes on her sweater. We watched a fat robin dart from tree to tree. Since Mirelle notices everything, I start to, too -- we are a good team. I show her new things, tell her what things mean; she reminds me of the beauty and wonder in the mundane.
But spring is anything but mundane, and it was just then, laying in the grass with Mirelle, already a world away from the glow of my computer screen, that I remembered/woke up/realized what I already knew: that doing things that make you feel truly ALIVE are really what it's all about. And I remembered how I had felt the day before on my run: it was that feeling. I do love my job, but it's still a job: Working at my computer, sitting, moving from task to task. My work is so much easier at my desk if I instill some aliveness into my day, away from the computer.
Other things that have recently brought on a sense of aliveness: hot yoga class, being creative with paper/collage (need to do this one, but I know it works...)
More aliveness. More often. What does it for you?